Christian dating tip youth
If you would have asked me if I was doubting God’s ability to change me, I would have said no.
I can remember very vividly what it was like to feel the pull of pornography.
I can remember those long nights, exhausted but still alert, looking for my fix.
While fantasizing or watching pornography, porn stars were not the focus of my attention: I was.
The porn girls were more or less trophies of my fantasy: their “beauty,” their avidity, and their hysterically euphoric response to “me” was the whole point.
What kept the porn-viewing ritual going for hours was the high I got from thinking about “the next girl,” the next video clip, the next picture, believing there was always something better around the corner just waiting to be discovered.
Often I would stop looking at porn and just “get the job done” not because I wanted to stop looking but because I was exhausted.
I believed marriage would be the cure-all, my “in-house fix.” But the very nature of porn addiction exposes this lie, doesn’t it?
Marriage is about intimacy with : it was never enough to lust after one woman.
Porn was my way of cheating the universe that had denied me; it was my tantrum at God.
Had my mind not been so clouded at the time, I would have been forced to admit marriage was no more a “right” than anything else in life: it is only by God’s undeserved mercy and patience that I have any blessings in my life at all. But when I believe I “need” them, then God becomes a capricious Creator bent on placing people into impossible situations, demanding chastity but pushing us beyond the breaking point.
No, God had begun transforming my heart long before I ever met my wife, and even now, I still depend on Him to continue that transforming work.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating