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Fast forward to February 2004 and a prominent Brisbane private school was forced to call in the police when the bullying by a group of girls spiralled out of control.

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“For starters, power for girls is about who has the most ‘Girl World’ things,” says Wiseman, using a phrase she coined to describe those things girls feel are vital to their survival.

“Being generically pretty, having the most money so that they have the right style, having the right boyfriend, knowing how to communicate well with adults so that they leave you alone … And you don’t have to have all those things but it’s about who has the most.

Today it is recognised as the most pervasive form of bullying amongst girls and boys – perhaps because it so easily goes unnoticed by teachers or parents.

Relational bullying is distinct from physical and verbal bullying because it’s a silent campaign aimed at inflicting psychological pain on the target and breaking up their relationships with others.

I think one of the most frustrating things for kids and parents is that frequently the “mean girls” who behave like bullies are incredibly articulate and charming in front of teachers.

I heard of a high school recently where a bully was awarded a student leadership badge …

“Research shows that one in six Australian children is bullied on a weekly basis,” says Rigby.

“I don’t think we’re taking bullying seriously enough.” Rigby points out that relational bullying is not limited to girls.

And it’s the rush – the competition for them – that creates the hierarchy amongst girls.” Ask Wiseman why girls are more likely to bully one another using methods like gossip and exclusion, and she’ll tell you that it’s part biology and part sociology.

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